Saturday, November 30, 2013

Tis The Season To Be Angry

Most of you only see my good side which is how I am 90 percent of the time. But when my little brain gets tired or frustrated, I go full "Hulk Smash" mode. Even Dad and Mom who work out every day have trouble holding me down. I had a hulk smash moment on Thanksgiving. While Mom and Dad were working hard to get the house ready for all of our guests, I flipped out playing the Wii and smashed another LED flat screen. That's right, another one. This forced Dad and Big Bro to venture out on Black Friday to get a new one. Dad should be thankful my event was in time for him to partake in the annual running of the bargain hunters, but he didn't see it that way. This would be a recipe for disaster sending the two people in my house who have the most trouble controlling their anger. Big Bro and Dad. Big Bro can't control it for 2 seconds before he resorts to his arsenal of F-Bombs and other words I don't even recognize. And Dad who usually keeps his tirade of calling people some of the worst names ever uttered to the safe confines of his car, but yesterday unleashed some of his classics within earshot of the People of Walmart. Today, our version of the Griswolds will venture out to get a Christmas tree and string up outdoor lights and decorate the house. This usually presents a ripe minefield for the three angry amigo men of my family to have some classic outbursts, so watch the news, you may see us.

So what's the point of this post you ask? Well, amidst all of the anger, there are people who control it in surprising ways, and that is what I am thankful for. People like Big Sis who keeps her anger almost unseen and Mom who should have killed me 100 times by now for some of the outbursts I have, but is able to calm me down before I hurt myself or break something....usually. You should be thankful for all of the people out there who take the high road when most people would get angry. For example, a few years ago my family went to a swanky resort in St. John USVI for a vacation. I'm not sure what we were thinking dragging this circus of disfunctionality to such a beautiful place, but that's my Mom and Dad, never shying away from what normal people do. Well, HELLO, I'm not normal. I always have that little green Hulk just below the surface, which usually rears it's head when we try to sit down and eat at a restaurant. So there we were on the last day of our vacation trying to have breakfast at the swanky resort's beach-side restaurant. We almost made it through the meal with Mom and Dad doing their job of flanking me on each side shoveling food into their mouths with one hand and managing me with the other. Eat some eggs......fix the iPad, bite of bacon....put Sam's shoe back on. It goes on like this until I reach my breaking point and need to be extracted from the scene by Dad while all of the other patrons try not to stare at what appears to be a crazy child abduction. Why someone would abduct a crazy kid like me in full meltdown mode is kind of a funny thought in and of itself. So towards the end of this breakfast, Mom and Dad let their guard down for one millisecond, just enough time for me to get off my shoe, get it into my free hand, and heave it with all of my might across the restaurant.....I can throw pretty far. It was like everything went into slow motion as we watched the Nike flying slowly through the air all tensing and hoping it would land safely on the floor away from any diners. Just then, slow motion stopped, everything sped up, and gravity took hold of the sneaker and yanked it right onto the table of a man and woman at the other end of the restaurant. It smashed the man's water glass which was full of water.....of course.....and then hit his plate and skittered noisily off the table along with his silverware. Before the man could even comprehend what had just happened, my family and I had thrown some money down for the bill, scooped up our belongings and fled the scene to the ferry which would take us away. We finally calmed down as the ferry pushed off and we were surrounded by Caribbean sea. Ten minutes into the ride, Dad's heart sunk as he saw the man who ate my shoe for breakfast approaching us. How lucky, no where to escape to. Dad flipped through a few scenarios in his head of how he would deal with what was sure to be another angry person who didn't understand our full back-story. So as Dad planned his curse words carefully and planned how he would neutralize our new friend if it got to that, Mom looked out for the rest of us. Then, something special happened. The man smiled at Dad and handed him my shoe. He told Mom and Dad that he could see what we as a family have to deal with and complimented them for doing so. That man made a lasting impression on Mom and Dad. Dad thinks of him a lot when he see's other people getting angry over nonsense like Black Friday deals or the barrista getting your confusing latte order wrong. So in this season ripe with anger-producing moments, try to be like the man on the ferry and be nice to someone. They'll be thankful. And to that mystery man, I hope you can someday read my blog and know how thankful I was. Happy Holidays to you....

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