More Frogs less Richards

I've seen a few Facebook postings about Disney Princes this week. Plus, my Big Bro did a Prince-like Promposal this week as well. Who knew he had it in him. His date is pretty, smart and athletic... and a big Disney fan. Seems like lots of girls want a prince like those in the Disney movies. Who wouldn't? They're virtuous, handsome, respectful, smart, brave....you get the picture. I still think of Big Bro as more of a frog than a prince, but I know he's really a prince and will always treat girls and women with respect. Most princes in high school are still frogs who will have their metamorphosis when they get older. Not too many girls like them now, but will later on in life. On the flip side, I also notice lots of boys who we'll call Richards. I think there's an abbreviated name for Richard, but hey, I'm 10. Anyways, I see lots of these Richards who are supposedly the cool kids being rude to girls and being rude in general. There are lots of these Richards roaming the halls of high schools everywhere. You can usually spot them wearing their slides and black socks, while plenty of frog/princes move about in semi-obscurity usually drawing a blind eye from the girls...for now. I'm glad there are parents raising the invisible Princes out there, because I know they will grow to be good men who treat people respectfully, especially women. So from one little 10 year old frog to all the frogs out there, keep your heads up, it's only a matter of time. And to all the Richards, pull your pants up, put on some real shoes, and stay away from my sister!!!

Slightly Different

It may sound strange, but sometimes I prefer being as drastically different as I am. Once people meet me, they know I have some serious issues and they are immediately nice to me. They would never tease me or make fun of me. Even the "typical" kids I've known from kindergarten through 4th grade have been nice and have never teased or bullied me. Lots of my "atypical" brethren experience the same treatment, whether they have abby normal brains like mine, or they have visible physical limitations. The more messed up you are, the more likely you won't be teased or bullied. Even the bullies steer clear. Obviously there are still a few cowards who poke fun of handicapped people behind their backs or behind closed doors, but I have yet to see someone do it directly. So while my friends and I are safe from the majority of bullies, I feel deeply for the kids, and adults, out there who are "slightly different". They are "normal" compared to me, but they may be smaller, or act differently, or have something about them that makes them slightly different from the majority of "perfect" people around them. These are the poor souls who are fair game for the bullies. Like the poor boy near Pittsburgh this week who finally snapped in such a severe way from the stress of being slightly different and the effect of the teasing of the perfect kids. He was slightly different and his life has been ruined by the bullies. 

Now, I know many many kids like Big Bro, Big Sis and all of their teenage friends who would never tease someone different in order to make themselves fit in more with the cool kids. I guess that's because they are not insecure and they have the right people in their lives making them feel good about themselves and teaching them to help others to make yourself feel better, rather than demeaning others. My dad says bullies are the product of bad parents and they are to blame. I think he's right for the most part, but I also think that if I saw a schoolmate being bullied, I would help to stop it. So, I wonder why so many kids, teachers and parents don't step in to stop bullying when they see it. It's not really that hard to notice. I don't think we can ever fix the bad parenting. It reminds me of a quote from the movie Parenthood where Tod with one D, states "You know, Mrs. Buckman, you need a license to buy a dog, to drive a car - hell you even need a license to catch a fish. But they'll let any (insert bad adjective followed by bad noun) be a father" Tod is right, bully-makers will continue to do their poor job at parenting, unleashing the jerks of the world upon us, but we don't have to accept that. I beg of every kid, teacher, coach and parent to pay attention and step in when they see a bully or when they see someone teasing. Don't yell at them, but talk to them. Tell them how that makes people feel. Tell them they don't need to belittle someone else to make themselves more secure. Give them what their parents are not, and you might just save their life and the life of someone who is slightly different.

Great Expectations

I went to a party last night for my grand mom's and grand pop's 50th wedding anniversary. There were lots of people there who have been married for a long time. My other mom-mom and pop-pop also have been married 50 years. Uncle Dan's parents are about to celebrate their 60th. There were also some of my younger cousins there who just started their journey or are about to. I wondered what they all thought their experience would be like, compared to what reality handed them. Look at the two clueless twenty-somethings pictured here. They look pretty happy. They had great expectations, none of which even remotely included my situation or that of my brother's. But, had they known then what they know now, they would have still gotten hitched. You see, it's not at all about what you want that makes for a long and successful union, it's how you adapt and deal with what fate's adventures come your way. I know I will probably never get married, but I certainly look forward to being part of the adventures mom and dad may have around the next bend, some of which I will most likely create for them. So to anyone starting their adventure and to those waiting for their next one, remember that sometimes the greatest expectations are the unexpected.